What it's like to be waiting for a Jury Verdict
the waiting....is the hardesttttt paaaaaaart
There is nothing like the energy of waiting to find out whether you have proven your case beyond a reasonable doubt.
Yesterday I tweeted a few thoughts and events that happened between Defense close and the jury verdict. Here is a running journal of yesterday’s agony:
4 pm
Defense rests, jury instructions given. I’m torn whether defendant should have testified. I cannot say details of the case for doxxing purposes, but it was a situation where he was damned if he did and damned if he did not. I think he should have testified on one detail, let us rip it a bit, then sit back down.
4:05 pm
I never know what to do or where to go while waiting for a jury. I probably SHOULD do work, and usually do some. It’s forced free time. In honor of defendant probably going to prison, should I do a prison workout with my pull-up bar and sit-ups? Read a book? Paint some pictures, sell them for thousands of dollars to Democratic donors, then laugh about what a great money laundering scheme art is?
4:06 pm
I ask my trial partner what he will be doing.
“It’s 4 pm so working”.
He’s an older guy who came back decades later after private practice because he liked the work. I should probably follow his lead, I’m buried due to being in trial all week. He’s not my usual trial partner, so it was nice to get to know him.
4:48 pm
Spent the last 40 minutes on twitter. What did I learn?
-The US government lies to its people
-There is a feud between Trump and DeSantis
- Communists want to destroy the U.S. FROM WITHIN
In other words, nothing. What a waste.
5:05 pm
Twitter again. This thing is so addictive. I really need to stop…
What should I eat for dinner? I forgot to bring snacks. I’m not hungry but feel like I should eat out of boredom. There’s popcorn, but every time I eat that popcorn I get sick. Does popcorn expire? Feels like popcorn would be a good apocalypse bunker food.
5:30 pm
I ate the popcorn and now feel sick. Where’s the jury? I thought an hour, MAYBE two…but really it was open and shut. Right?
Right?
RIGHT?!?
6:30 pm
Jury is still out. I am putting away my files that my trial partner stepped up on all week. One pile had to-do’s, the other did not. Glad I clarified which was which before he left.
Wonder if I fucked up the trial. I got the evidence in, witnesses were fantastic, jury paid attention to my opening and close. Still, this should not take this long. I’ll call my dad and say hi.
6:45 pm
What happens to people past age 70? I love my father but he makes that Epstein suicide joke wayyy too much. I get it, you and Mom have a disagreement about pasta. Do we need to say “if I did it wasn’t suicide!” that often?
It was hilarious the first time, props on that.
WHERE IS THE JURY?!?
7:45 PM
Instead of working I am re-hashing the case over and over and over again. I’m po dunk county Charlie:
Jury still has no questions, BUT NOW I HAVE SOME.
What if…
MY QUESTIONS ARE THE SAME AS THE JURIES? IS THAT THE HANGUP?
Maybe I’ll call Mrs. Kong. Actually, that’s a terrible idea.
“How was your day, Mrs. K?”
“Well I…”
“WHY DO YOU THINK THE JURY IS STILL OUT? SHOULD I HAVE NOT WENT ON BOTH COUNTS?!?”
I text instead.
8:11 pm
VERDICT IS IN.
Time to nervous poop, followed by going to court.
8:20 pm
I ask my trial partner what he did to kill time.
“I ate too many gummy bears, feel terrible.”
Starting to like this guy.
8:25 pm
Defendant’s extended family is in court. I cannot imagine what THAT feels like.
There are quite a few of them. May want to have a plan for exiting given my car is across the street….
8:31 PM
GUILTY, GUILTY!
Hearing those words is a relief. Neither my partner nor I do anything but turn in the pre-filled forms for a conviction (always believe in yourself frens). Defendant’s family starts to cry. I do feel for them, and a bit for him. He probably had a terrible life.
HOWEVER, many people have bad lives but don’t commit felonies. Is what it is.
8:40 pm
I exit the courtroom and shake hands with the victim, victim’s family. They are also crying. It’s sort of like the end of a big sporting event - one side is crying tears of joy, the other tears of sadness.
I decline drinks with some of the detectives that worked up the case. I like my marriage so we’re good.
8:41 pm
“Can’t do drinks but can you give me an escort to my car?”
“Sure”
Kong loves a good armed escort, especially about ten years ago and female.
Just kidding. Maybe.
9:10 pm
Home, victory setting in. Life is great.