(No, not the above, although recent events make it slightly more comical)
I came across the perfect joke. It first had me laughing to myself, then quickly realizing the depth of its brilliance. Twenty three words, each perfectly placed and crafted. Like Alan learning to count cards, I found myself obsessed with this one joke:
What makes this perfect? The layers upon layers of comedy.
FIRST: the apparent subject of religion. Religion is taboo. One is not supposed to discuss their beliefs unless at church or using religion to sell sweet merch. This does two things:
One - gets the reader interested. A TABOO subject? Tell me MORE! Second - it builds tension. Religion? That’s a no no. Are you going to slander Thy God?!? In six words, you are hooked. Before getting to number two, here’s George Carlin, my favorite comedian of all time, on religion:
I’m a God fearing man myself, but boy does Carlin make some hilarious points.
Back to this joke:
Second layer: he had to give it up because he had nothing to say. This is misdirection. The assumed topic is being an atheist. Now it becomes why he gave it up. This man found GOD, but why? He had nothing to say? This forces your brain to dig deep. Why would he have nothing to say? Everyone has something to say. Even my newborn son kooes at me and screams for milk. This guy who believed, against society and for an emptiness void into eternity, was speechless? The listener has no clue what is to come next. Perfect setup for the delivery:
Third: the perfect surprise. Comedy is all about surprise. Think Dave Chappelle having the crack baby yell at him. A baby on a street corner, oh my goodness SAVE IT! Then…
boom! Crowd goes nuts. Surprise! Didn’t see the baby talking and talking smack. Perfect surprise.
In the joke above, the blow job is, as you guessed, the surprise. This works in many ways. Religion and blow jobs usually do not go together, and when they do it's not great for the religion involved in the scandal.
It is a complete and utter surprise. Think of this when talking to the NPCs at work or at a bar. Use that surprise to hammer home the difference between you and about everyone else.
The other element I like is how the joke let's you fill in the religious part of the blow job. There’s not much to say during a BJ; as I mentioned on Twitter, it's almost awkward if you say something…but almost everything to say is awkward. Some variation of ‘God yes’ or ‘My GOD’ is the extent of my talk. I've never asked for feedback on my end of the receiving a blow job, so I'll assume everything I do is great. The point I was originally making is by not SAYING the quiet part out loud, it puts you there to finish the joke. It is the same premise Scott Adams uses for Dilbert. Dogbert, pointy haired boss…they allow you to see YOUR dog or YOUR boss in the characters.
Writing a perfect joke is far from delivering a perfect joke, but crawl before you high jump. Use the break down above to go from chump to Chad comedy.
PS - if you are a subscriber, I will help with any public speaking event or speech you have for free.
I cannot promise immediate turn around, that this offer will last forever, and please do not send me two hours of ranting, but that is my thank you for subscribing.
Send questions and potential appointments to: BowTiedKong@protonmail.com.
Namaste.